The happy place

👋 hello hello

Thinking I should take a few days off. Thinking I should do something about my fear of heights. Like exposure therapy and everyday climb the scaffolding as high as I dare to and then add one step.

Thinking that it would be easier to have a few beers first to loosen up the nerves as alcohol does sometimes lend courage.

Then again I’m thinking probably that’s not a very good idea.

That’s all I’ve had the time to think about so far. The other stuff are mostly such thoughts I’ve thought before.

I’m like a record or even a song stuck on repeat.

I’m thinking that most ideas and thoughts people in general have (me included) are such things which more or less have been thought before in some shape or form.

It’s easier to live today: It doesn’t weight on me as much. It’s heavy some times but I’m incredibly strong and durable, a Cimmerian.

I listened to Scooter today.

Did it with the teacher  She was hot like Salsiccia  Chop chop  Yeah

Inspiring.

I will make it through this life one day at a time, like a Salsiccia.

Chop chop

Yeah

Woke up with mild headache.

It’s gone now.

I have zero interest in snyk kubernetes controllers installed via helm charts.

It’s about as interesting to me as listening to some drunk dude talking about how to breathe through a didgeridoo to make it sound consistently even while you inhale. It’s a special technique he said called ”circular breathing”.

Or as interesting as looking at some sort of sport. I have tried to care about sports, but it doesn’t work. I feel nothing.

Think I’m in the wrong line of work. On the other hand I don’t know what would be the right one.

I just want to be rich without going through so much effort, is that too much to ask for?

Better get started on my new book.

I’ve heard there are tools searching text (code) even faster than ag, “the silver searcher”, but I’ve never been in that big of a hurry, so I’ve not tried. I wouldn’t know.

It’s one of those doors which I’ll never open.

I shaved my beard. I do that when the moustache grows into my mouth. That’s the only grooming I ever do outside of jira.

Now I look like Barbapapa until it grows back.

I’m glad I’m not a fish. They don’t have an easy life: being predated on by bigger fish, no hands to scratch itches with etc, plastic bottles and micro plastics from fleece jackets everywhere.

Swimming in your own latrine everyday must take a toll on you sooner or later.

Every day is a struggle for survival for a fish.

The good thing is that you can move in three dimensions, but then a fish is still a downgrade from being a bird.

I suppose being a merman in the ocean could be OK.

I’d rather be a human though.

Rather than that I’d like to be an elf.

I once saw on TV or in a book or something of someone having a coffee machine in the bathroom, and it was obviously full of poo germs and laden with invisible feces molecules.

I would like to have a cappuccino machine. Fancy people drink cappuccino from the type of cup which is shaped like a half sphere with a tiny little ear you can’t even stick your pinkie finger through.

I don’t want a machine with pods of aluminium and that shit, that’s not right at all. It smells of vendor lock-in!! Of a coffee machine?? A real heavy one like the Italians have. Like a furniture utensil.

It’s not that I can’t afford one, I could buy me ten of them gaggia machines, it’s that I’ve got nowhere to put them, cause the kitchen is full of stuff already, and everywhere is full of stuff.

I shall have to run a deep defragmentation of my home to make it all fit, cause I’m not gonna do like that person, I don’t want a feces laden coffe maker.

Do you like hail? It’s a form of ice pellets raining from the sky, like gods hard ice fists indiscriminately beating everything from above.

It’s a doomsday weather if I ever seen one.

Dangerous!!

Today the ice pellets weren’t big like fists at all, but small like pearl sugar. Being sprinkled by pearl sugar whilst jogging, like I was today, is more like a celebration of confetti and about as far from being a doomsday as one might possibly come. The opposite, then: A boonsday!!

Hail is versatile.

When I saw Architects they had confetti raining down on the audience!!

Speaking of which, I sometimes listen to the piano reprise version of Doomsday and pretend it is I who play the piano and sing. I do that sometimes, the people (in my imagination) never knew I was such a good singer.

It‘s just such an amazing song that one, lyrics and singing is eerie and very haunting or something, hard to describe.

Ok that’s it for now!!

That was something seven of nine said to Harry Kim when they were out scanning nebulas for some reason I don’t remember. Probably a good one. But she said that the Borg value efficiency, not redundancy.

It’s the context of the thing too: it’s redundant to scan a nebula a fifth time, sure, so maybe don’t do that, but it’s also redundant to have two eyes, ears and noses.

Speaking of which, isn’t it strange that we have only one heart, albeit in my case a big one?

In a metaphorical sense I’ve given several of my hearts to my family and friends, but the big one I keep for myself, because I need it to live and I’m not sure whether I’ve got one several lives.

This all I thought of when I read my previous post (a good one).

Today woke me up at 05:45 or maybe 04:45. Not sure. Was some allergic reaction in left nose. Mayhap I am allergic to snot and sometimes it reaches some critical threshold and spirals out of control.

Not sure.

It’s not like I am a scientist or something; I have only the faintest idea of what’s going on in my life or the world around me.

I am given a certain amount of brain power and a certain amount of curiosity, and the sum total is nowhere near enough to gain a comprehensive enough understanding of things around me for me to make many definite statements.

That’s not to say that I am not grateful for the many gifts I have: two eyes, only one is lazy, two noses. Ok it’s only one nose, but it has two channels and only one of them is congested. I have also two knees, and only one is wobbly and tends to hop out of its place: The cap.

The brain is functioning too, and honestly it’s pretty powerful. Arguably.

But these are not my greatest gifts at all: I have a big heart and a high EQ.

If I may say so myself.

I may say so myself, because here I can put whatever stuff I want.

It doesn’t even have to be true.

Feeling like a caviar tube with only 10% left inside, I’m soon ready to retire for the day.

Retirement of my career on the other hand lies further away; somewhere in the distance; I cannot see it.

I’ve been thinking to add a few more skills just to have a fall back career, just in case, and computers do not have the same appeal to me as they once did, and I’ve laid all my eggs so far in that basket.

Almost.

I have one more basket with a single egg and that’s my forklift license, but that’s probably rotten now, being so long ago and old and all.

I have one more basket with some hands I can paint, but that’s not the type of egg people will pay to see I think.

There is one more basket which is empty: that’s the book I’m about to write; the masterpiece.

That is likely to make me rich, if not I’ve also been thinking about welding. I think that could be fun.