Tuesday
Thinking about some different stuff like I’ve been very absent minded lately not really paying attention to what I do, sawing stuff the wrong way, not listening at meetings and so on. Think there are lots of stuff going on in my life, at work etc, which is still somewhat unclear and I’ll just need some time to digest.
I’ll go down to the office one final time next week to meet my friends, some for the last time (probably), and turn in the laptop and that’s not one minute too soon I reckon.
There was a third wave of “realignments“ this week. It is tough to see some of your friends lose financial safety, but humans are resilient creatures generally, so maybe in a year or two it’ll all be good for most of them. I hope.
I Had a friend. He lost his job last time there was a recession, must’ve been fifteen years ago, and I think he succumbed to the alcohol, but that was many years ago.
That’s the thing, not knowing which is the final straw before it all tips over. It think that if too many shitty things coincide, that that’s enough to send someone into the abyss. Some of them never come back, and if they do, they are never the same again: they might become stronger, but never without paying the terrible toll.
I feeling not OK .
But it’s just a low key sadness which has sunken its claws in me lately and I will persevere. I need the yang to feel the yin.
Probably I ought to take a run.