The happy place

Hello I just need to get the thoughts of the day into writing

First there was a middle aged lady stood outside by the train station with a megaphone like some sort of street preacher, imploring everyone to take heed of our mortalities, that we would all be dead in merely one hundred years, and that we should worry about this fact

Which sounded counter intuitive to me, because that is the one thing I do not worry about. I figure the good thing about being dead is that all of the sorrows die too, but I think of course she is alluding to eternal damnation

Of course she is.

I don’t think that’s gonna happen, but time will tell which one of us got it right.

Then I started listening on repeat to ”My Sorrowful Wife” by ”Nick Cave”, a great text about love and the betrayal of inadequacy, which is to not be enough to heal the ones we love, maybe even the opposite, through blindness and foolishness

I listen to it with a lump in my chest

…

To not be able to take the pain away

To just stand by not being able to heal their hurt, not to be able to mend

Even though that’s really what you want most of all

That’s sad