On having lazy eyes

It’s fucked up how things can sneak up on you until one day you cannot focus vision into one coherent picture, because the brain cannot consolidate the image from the right eye with the one from the left one, because it has finally become too lazy for the exercise, and thus you have become super lazy eyed.

Suddenly there are two TV:s instead of one no matter how much you squint, without being able to say when it began. At first the left eye went rouge only when drunk, then when drunk and/or tired, then finally when drunk and/or not drunk.

And/or tired/not tired.

Always.

Anyhow so this happened to me some year ago, but thanks to the miracle of modern science I’ve gotten very special prism glasses which compensate for the lazy eye, and forces the eyes and brains to cooperate with one another.

Now I got eagle vision.

The other option was surgery. I am not a fan of surgeries in general and the ones where they pluck the eye out of its socket in particular.

Later I learned that they don’t actually pull the eye out for that procedure, but by then I’d made my mind up already.

I’m much a fan of glasses in general.

They act like a pair of riot shields: I’ve had bugs and stones and other unpleasantries ricochet against the glass where they would’ve hit the eyeball had I not worn them.

My father has the same situation if not worse with his eyes: My aunt has this anecdote where once they were in a car and there was this thick fog outside and the vision was very limited and my father was driving. My aunt said (worriedly): “you can barely see the road”, to which my father answered: “Don’t worry, I see two”.

That’s a good one.