The happy place

on my last garden party, there was a strong powerful wave of contentment stemming from seeing my friends and neighbours getting along, while I sit parked in the folding chair with one beer resting in each armrest.

I compare myself to a dog then, and I mean it in the best sense of the world.

Having a sense of belonging

Seeing people having a great time without I having to intervene

Like a fat lazy dog basking in the warmth of a budding friendship.

and I spoke to my friend exactly 666 miles from my folding chair; he’d been out with some 100 colleges of the fire brigade to extinguish a fire believed to have been caused by a faulty washing machine; some poor family’s house turned to ashen rubble overnight.

And it blows my mind how these things can happen at the same time.

These contrasts are everywhere all of the time

Of this life in this world, precious and cruel.

indifferent

And in my way, I’m sensitive now to these facts and things because I’m in the rediscovery phase in which the fundaments of my world needs to be reconstructed but the concrete needs time to harden

Or it’ll crack anew, and that I will avoid if possible

And thus the skin is extra sensitive to the undercurrents

And I have so much love to give

And I am loved

And I am no fool, I know this is precious, even more so than saffron